Codependents: It’s Ok Not To Forgive Your Toxic Parents
The headline is perhaps a confusing one to anyone who has experienced trauma and abuse in their life. The helping professions are full of practitioners who deal in the art of forgiveness…
Should You Bother Trying To Set Boundaries With A Narcissist?
I talk a lot about boundaries. I believe they are the foundation of a healthy relationship. Setting boundaries means being emotionally honest, assertive and it means protect your emotional and physical space. Boundaries maintained and with appropriate consequences teach people in a healthy way how you want to be treated…
Thinking Of Yourself Is Not Narcissism. Your Needs Are Important And It Starts With You
There is a fine line between meeting your own needs in a healthy sense and expecting to take everything around you. This is the fundamental line that many find difficult to navigate and feel guilt and shame when they try to think of themselves…
Relationships Are All About Balance Of Power…. And We Fight To Keep It
It is of very little consequence how good you feel your relationship is, there is a dynamic that defines the interaction and what you do. It doesn’t matter if it is a friendship, work or a romantic relationship, we like to control things the best we can…
Codependents And Infidelity: It Doesn’t Always Pan Out How You Might Expect
One confession that I make with some trepidation is that I was an avid watcher of the reality tv show “Cheaters”, in the 90’s. Joey Greco who was the host of the show built the cases up well and it made for interesting viewing…
Can Group Therapy Really Help Codependent Recovery?
Group therapy is often defined by stereotypes taken from television programmes, especially in the US, depicting recovering alcoholics starting the process by stating „“ My name is…I am an alcoholic“. This is often heralded by the rest of the group…
How To Navigate A Break-Up As A Codependent Intent On Connection
Break-ups can be nasty experiences and we all go through them. The best case scenario is that a couple can mutually agree to separate and logically work through that process. However, the presence of emotion and sometimes extreme emotion, makes that seemingly simple process extremely difficult. If you add into that mix, a level of codependency, then it complicates the matter greatly…
The Narcissist-Codependent Dance
Among my patient group (and circle of friends), there are people who continually allow others to take advantage of them, continue to give and stay in very toxic relationships. They attempt to make themselves indispensable for their partners (and everyone else) and become the local and family martyr…
Codependents: What To Do When Your Protective Mind Provokes Anger
In my job, I deal daily with lots of angry codependent people. There are those who are angry about something specific (and sometimes have a right to be) and those who are just angry. Sometimes, they do not even know why and they are often angry at things that they have no influence over at all. Behind every bout of anger is a fear driving the process…